“Baby, If You’ve Ever Wondered.” Spending Thanksgiving with Friday Flash Fics: November 18, 2022

Posted on November 18, 2022 by jeffbaker307

Baby, If You’ve Ever Wondered

by Jeff Baker

Okay. I’ll just sit you down here. Gotta love these baby carriers. Got you right here on this old kitchen table. Don’t worry, it’s as sturdy as this house and maybe about as old! Don’t look at me like that, I’m not going to cook you. Your Dad and my big sister watch too many horror movies! What do you…oh, oh. Got your bottle right here. Yeah, there you go. Can you hold it? Okay, laying it down you can kind of hold it. Oooo, you were hungry, weren’t you? I gotta check the turkey.

Where’s the thermometer? I set that aside last night? I…oh, there it is. Hang on, I gotta open the oven door. Sloooooowly, this thing creaks. Don’t want to wake up the rest of the house. There. Now, I just pull this out. Oops! Better grab an oven mitt! My screams would wake up Mom and your folks. And you’d probably laugh.

Okay. There. Now, pull off the foil and thhhheeeeerrrrrre’s the turkey! Doesn’t that look good? And smell that? Yummm! Just stick the thermometer in right here and check the temperature…mmmmmm. Okay, I wrote it down here, uhhhhh, cook until it’s…yeah that’s okay. Now check here annnnnnd. Yes. Doin’ good. Cover it up, where’d I put that foil? Oh there it is.

You know, I remember your Granddad showing me how to do this. He used to cook the turkey overnight, just like this. I remember when I was a little kid. You woulda liked him, I think. Yeah, when I was a kid we ate around this table a lot. It’s still kinda scuffed up in a few places. And you’ll like your Uncle Enrico when I get him out here. He had to work on Thanksgiving. I’m just glad your Grandma and your folks are okay with it. Wow. I haven’t been back to this house in over a year. Live too far away. This house is about a hundred-and-twenty years old, I’m twenty seven and you’re about…oh, seven months? Something like that.

You know, you’re named after me? Your middle name anyway. Kristoff. I go by Chris anyway. I, well we, were named after our Great-Grandfather. Okay, my Great-Grandfather, your Great-Great-Grandfather. And you were named after your Uncle Chris. Yeah.

You finished with your bott…oh. You’re asleep. Good. Not the first guy I’ve bored into unconsciousness. I’ll just take you, umpf! Into the living room, set you down and kick back in Dad’s old chair and look through yesterday’s paper. Where’s the sports section? Oh, there it is. I can’t find anything anymore. Must be gettin’ old.

—end—

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! From all of us at Friday Flash Fics! Taking a break for Thanksgiving week! I’ll post a prompt pic for December 2nd next week! ——jeff

Posted in Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Friday Flash Fictions, LGBT, Short-Stories, Thanksgiving | Leave a comment

A Legendary Brass Bed on an Ice Shelf (or something like that!) Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, November 2022: The Results!

Posted on November 14, 2022 by jeffbaker307
Photo by stein egil liland on Pexels.com

The Draws for the November Flash Fiction Draw Challenge were: A Legend or Tall Tale, involving a Brass Bed set on an Ice Shelf.

Jeffrey Ricker wrote “The Brass Bed and the Epic Journey” https://jeffrey-ricker.com/november-flash-fiction-draw-the-brass-bed-and-the-epic-journey/

E. H. Timms wrote “Never Underestimate Little Old Dolls” https://thinkingthinking123.blogspot.com/2022/11/flash-fic-challenge-never-underestimate.html

And Mike Mayak (that’s me!) wrote “The Death of Ezekiel Pink” https://authorjeffbaker.com/2022/11/08/the-death-of-ezekiel-pink-flash-fiction-draw-challenge-story-poem-for-november-2022-by-jeff-baker/

My thanks to our contributors and the wonderful variety they provided!

Ess you here next month, same draw time, same draw channel!

(I’ve always wanted to say that!)

——–mike

Posted in E. H. Timms, Fantasy, Fiction, Horror, Jeffrey Ricker, Legend, Mike Mayak, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Poetry, Science Fiction, Short-Stories | Leave a comment

Rainbow Snippets: David R. Slayton’s “Deadbeat Druid.” November 13, 2022—-Jeff Baker

Posted on November 13, 2022 by jeffbaker307

Every week we post six lines from a work of ours, a work-in-progress or published or a recommendation of someone else’s work with at least one LGBT character. Posted at Rainbow Snippets here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/963484217054974

This week, I’m posting a few lines from my friend David R. Slayton’s latest novel “Deadbeat Druid” https://www.blackstonepublishing.com/deadbeat-druid-dh0x.html latest of three books he’s published about Adam Binder. We do a lot for the people we love. In this book, Adam Binder may literally have to go to Hell…

Here’s the link to David’s website: https://davidrslayton.com/ And here’s the snippets, maybe a line over six but the opening is so cool!

Death looked up from beneath a broad sun hat. Like she needed it. As if anything in the cosmos could touch her.

“Adam Lee Binder,” she said in a thick southern drawl. “As I live and breathe.”

“Do you?” he asked. “Live and breathe, I mean.”

Well, on that cheery note (and with snow headed my way!) I bid you farewell for this week! ——-jeff

Posted in Books, David R. Slayton, Fantasy, LGBT, Rainbow Snippets | 5 Comments

“Come Not Between the Dragon and his Wrath.” Friday Flash Fics for November 11, 2022 by Jeff Baker.

Posted on November 11, 2022 by jeffbaker307

Come Not Between the Dragon and His Wrath

by Jeff Baker

The six-foot-two-inch former college wrestler stood there in the mid-afternoon sun streaming through the restaurant window in his red shorts and pulled up his shirt revealing the red and green tattoo on his side. Just to the right of his six-pack abs the freshly-drawn dragon appeared to be crawling up Allan’s sculpted side.

“Whadya think?” Allan asked, almost shyly.

“It looks great,” Willie said, leaning against the last of the tables he’d been wiping down.

“Thanks.” Allan said pointing at it with a finger. “It’s a Chinese dragon. I had it done for Ian. For his birthday. His family’s Chinese, you know.”

“Yeah, I know.” Willie said. “You guys came in here to eat a couple of months ago.”

“I brought him in here to meet you.” Allan said, pulling his shirt down.

“Meeting the Ex,” Willie said with a grin. “Well, I hope he at least liked the restaurant.”

Willie was proud of the small downtown bistro he ran on the corner of a busy street.

“Ian liked you,” Allan said. “I told him all about you.”

“Including the last year we were together, which I don’t really remember?” Willie said with a smile and a raised eyebrow.

“You’ve done a bang-up job of turning your life around, and turning this place around.” Allan said. “Um, yeah, I told Ian all about umm…your problem and why we broke up.”

“Good.” Willie said. “You two shouldn’t have secrets.”

“Are you really okay with this?” Allan said. “I mean, we aren’t, you know, together anymore but…well, what you think still matters to me.”

“Thanks,” Willie said with a smile. “Hey, hold up a sec…”

Willie fished around in his apron pocket and handed a card to Allan.

“Good for a free lunch,” Willie said. “Birthday present. For Ian and you.”

“Oh wow!” Allan said. “Thanks! Hey, you’re invited to the wedding, when we schedule it!”

“Thanks.” Willie said. “Hey, you two don’t be strangers, okay?”

“Never!” Allan said with a smile.

As he walked to his car, Allan felt like he was soaring on the back of a winged dragon.

—end—

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New Story in RoM/Mantic Reads! “All the Pleasures Prove” by Jeff Baker, November 11, 2022.

Posted on November 11, 2022 by jeffbaker307

Dragons in the mall!

In my latest story set in the magical Food Garden Court, Skid and T’amec, our young and underpaid fast-food workers, face this and more, as their unexpected relationship causes a few questions to be asked!

It’s just been posted on the “RoM/Mantic Reads” e-zine. My thanks to Fiona Glass for her kind appreciation of my work!

The title, of course, is stolen from Shakespeare. https://rommanticreads.wordpress.com/2022/11/11/jeff-baker-all-the-pleasures-prove/

Posted in Food Garden Court, LGBT, Promo, RoM/Mantic Reads | Leave a comment

David R. Slayton’s New Book! “Deadbeat Druid.” (And My Copy is Signed!) —-Jeff Baker, November 10, 2022

Posted on November 10, 2022 by jeffbaker307

My friend David R. Slayton’s latest book “Deadbeat Druid” is now available and he was kind enough to sign my copy! It’s the latest in his supernatural series about Adam Binder. In this one, Adam must journey into the netherworld to find his beloved Vicente.

Here’s the link from the publisher: https://www.blackstonepublishing.com/deadbeat-druid-dh0x.html#541=199

Here’s David’s website: https://davidrslayton.com/

Happy Reading!

Posted in Books, David R. Slayton, Fantasy, Promo | Leave a comment

“The Death of Ezekiel Pink,” Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Story (Poem) for November 2022 by Jeff Baker.

Posted on November 8, 2022 by jeffbaker307
Photo by stein egil liland on Pexels.com

The Death of Ezekiel Pink

by Mike Mayak

(With apologies to Robert W. Service )

Author’s Note: The draws for the November 2022 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge were A Tall Tale or Legend, set on an Ice Shelf, involving a Brass Bed. The idea banged into my head almost instantly and this was the result. So, I turned it over to my occasional pen-name and this spoof/homage to a much more famous work was the result! Enjoy!

I.

Now the Great Ice Shelf’s up by itself

Up there in the Northern Land

Where it’s cold and dry but passers-by

Do come to stare and stand

Of the tales you’d conceive that nobody’d believe

The most fabulous of all it’s said

Is when one man chose that spot in the snows

As Ezekiel Pink’s death-bed

II.

Now Ezekiel Pink liked his food and his drink

But he liked his money as well

Prospecting as leaven had hardly been heaven

And he said he’d take his fortune to Hell

He said he was dyin,’ wouldn’t waste his time cryin’

But wanted to die in his bed

And he insisted the Great Ice Shelf’s vistas

Were the sights he would want in his head.

III.

So he paid several of us in coats and in gloves

To push his big brass bed along

To the spot on the shelf he’d picked out for himself

To hear the last of life’s sweet song

As he laid down to rest, one more last request

He asked of us there on the ice

“Here’s a list of all those I have wronged and suppose

Would come to hear me apologize.”

IV.

The first of the lasses, in coat and dark glasses

Trudged up to the man she held dear

She snuggled in bed and he spoke to her head

The words that she wanted to hear

And that was the way that it went all day,

A new woman about every hour

And Pink, snuggled warm had no idea of the storm

That was gradually gaining its power

V.

For they trudged to the shelf, each by herself

And they spoke and they left alone

But long about five with Pink still alive

He began to grumble and moan

For the women who’d sighed, snuggled by his side

Believing him not long for this world

Had met by their boats and then compared notes

And stalked back to the shelf, their fists curled

VI.

For they realized old Zeke was not near that peak

From whence no trav’ler returned

He’d called them to cuddle, hoped he could befuddle

These women but instead they felt burned.

They stalked angrily toward him and told him they’d warned him

“We’ve had it with your lies Zeke Pink”

Then with one rushing motion, they pushed his bed toward the ocean

And he quickly slid in the drink.

VII.

But the bed like a boat, decided to float

With Pink clutching fast to the rail

And the women, not caring commenced to swearing

And so Zeke used his sheets for a sail

And then he sailed away at the end of that day

Away from the women he’d wronged

And he sailed out of sight at the start of the night

Away from those for whom he’d longed

VIII.

But this story they say, did not end that day

With Ezekiel Pink and his sail

But from Dawson to Nome, wherever men roam

When the story is told, without fail

A voice will ring out, “Your tale I don’t doubt

For I ran into Pink just last year

You may greet this with laughter ‘twas my bride he was after

So I boxed him right smack in his ear.”

IV.

Now the Great Ice Shelf’s up by itself

Up there in the Northern Land

Where it’s cold and dry but passers-by

Do come to stare and stand

Of the tales you’d conceive that nobody’d believe

The most fabulous of all it’s said

Is when one man chose that spot in the snows

As Ezekiel Pink’s death-bed

—end—

——for Jerome Stueart

and to the memory of John R. Bogner

Posted in Fiction, Legend, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Poems, Poetry, Tall Tale | 2 Comments

A Brass Bed on an Ice Shelf—A Legend or Tall Tale: November 2022’s Flash Fiction Draws from Jeff Baker.

Posted on November 7, 2022 by jeffbaker307

First, here’s the prompts for the November 2022 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge. Then my usual long-winded explanation:

A Legend or Tall Tale

Set on an Ice Shelf

Involving a Brass Bed

Now, on to the details.

Hi! I’m Mike Mayak, I also write as Jeff Baker and I’m the current moderator for the monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, which was started by ‘Nathan Burgoine a few years ago and carried on by Cait Gordon and Jeffrey Ricker. It’s a monthly writing challenge mainly for stress-free fun that anyone can play.

Here’s how it works: the first Monday of every month I draw three cards; a heart, a diamond and a club. These correspond to a list naming a genre, a setting and an object that must appear in the story. Participants write up a flash fiction story, 1,000 words or less, post it to their website and link it here in the comments. I’ll post the results (and hopefully have one of my own written!) the week of November 14th, 2022.

As I’m no good making videos I did the drawing offstage and the results were the Five of Hearts (a Legend or Tall Tale; the King of Clubs (a Brass Bed) and the Jack of Diamonds (an Ice Shelf

So, get to writing and I’ll post the results next week!

Thanks for playing!

Oh, and a couple of notes here: I’m also posting this on my new Tribel page/account for “Mike Mayak,” and I intend to keep this going through 2023!

See ya! ———-Mike

Here’s the Tribel link: https://www.tribel.com/Jeff4550282/wall

Posted in Mike Mayak, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge | 2 Comments

Rainbow Snippets goes to RoM/Mantic Reads for “Billy Gonzalez and the Day of the Dead,” by Jeff Baker, November 5, 2022.

Posted on November 5, 2022 by jeffbaker307

Every week we post six lines from a work of ours, a work-in-progress or published or a recommendation of someone else’s work with at least one LGBT character. Posted at Rainbow Snippets here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/963484217054974

As we’ve just passed The Day of the Dead, here’s a story about the celebration (or about a college fundraiser using it as a theme!) And it gives me the chance to do some promo for the new “RoM/Mantic Reads” e-zine to which I am a regular contributor. https://rommanticreads.wordpress.com/2022/10/22/jeff-baker-billy-gonzalez-and-the-day-of-the-dead/ It’s the latest of my stories about bisexual (like me!) Billy Gonzalez and his knack for stumbling into the supernatural and the strange.

Schuyler Rowley was with the school’s Alumni Association and I’d kind of crushed on him during our largely-closeted school days and we’d gone out a couple of times in the five years since. But now he was standing in front of me in a skeleton costume. And he had another costume for me, complete with full-head skull mask.

“It’ll be fun,” Schuyler said. “We dance around in the Quad during the party and we can do some partying afterwards. It’s for the Scholarship fund, remember?”

Okay, okay. Here’s the rest of the scene.

“And we can go out later…” Schuyler said.

“Yeah, yeah, hand me the skull,” I said, feeling like Don Juan in that play about Hell.

The Quad, the big patio between the Library and the Gym was lit by electric lights and flickering torches, but I guessed those were just to keep the bugs away. Grinning alumni were seated at tables with skull centerpieces. The menu included candy skulls and a lot of Tex-Mex and a band playing on a makeshift stage. Skull decorations everywhere.

Well, that’s it for this week! Pleasant dreams, everyone! ——jeff

Posted in Billy Gonzalez, Day of the Dead, Fantasy, Fiction, Ghost Story, Halloween, Horror, LGBT, Rainbow Snippets, RoM/Mantic Reads | 8 Comments

“The Well-Tempered Clavier” Plays on Friday Flash Fics, November 4, 2022 by Jeff Baker

Posted on November 4, 2022 by jeffbaker307

The Well Tempered Clavier

by Jeff Baker

The loud music was blaring through the speakers and over the audience from the stage, with a little bit of colored smoke swirling around the keyboard and drum set.

“All right!” Marty said.

“Calm down,” Reg said, leaning into his ear to be heard over the blare. “They won’t be out for about another ten minutes. That one’s from their first album. They don’t play the old stuff anymore.” He pointed up as if he was pointing at the music.

“Are you sure they don’t…” Marty started to say. “Oh yeah, you went to school with whatsisname, the keyboard guy, right?”

“Warren, yeah.” Reg said. “Warren Wentworth the Third. We used to kid him about that guy in the X-Men comic books, but that was back in the nineties. He was a music major and he used to play those Tom Lehrer songs at the school talent shows.” Reg smiled at the memory. 1992 was over twenty years ago.

“Wow!” Marty said, seeming like a twenty-something kid, not a forty year old computer tech old enough to be the parent of half the kids at the concert. “Did you guys, like hang out a lot?”

“Wha?” Reg said as the music kicked into high gear.

“I said, did you hang out with Warren?”

“No, we never really went out. Not really.” Reg said, misunderstanding.

“What? What? You actually went out with the keyboard player for…” Marty yelled, trying to be heard over the music. If it hadn’t been for the music, everybody in the stadium would have heard.

Reg held his hand up to Marty’s ear. “It was very careful. Very casual. Remember, this was…”

The music started playing something softer. Reg sighed and went on.

“Remember, this was the early nineties. STD’s were still on everybody’s mind. Warren and I kind of went out but we never did anything that would have spread a cold.”

Warren had said he was Bi back then and it hadn’t been much of a secret. They’d sat around and talked about which of the jocks they thought was hot. All those long Autumns ago. Reg smiled again.

The softer song ended and there was a rat-a-tatt-tatt rhythm from the speakers.

“Yeah, they should be onstage pretty quick,” Reg said to Marty.

Marty grinned and nodded.

Reg felt the vibration in his pocket and pulled out his cell. He read the text and smiled.

Will be onstage till about ten. Meet at eleven-thirty at our old place. Remember? Warren.

Reg was grinning as he texted back: I remember! See ya!

—end—

AUTHOR’S NOTE: The X-Men reference is to “Warren Worthington the Third,” A.K.A. the high-flying Angel. ——jeff b.

Posted in Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Friday Flash Fictions, LGBT, Short-Stories | Leave a comment