“King Of The Road.” Friday Flash Fics for April 26th, 2024. From Jeff Baker.

King Of the Road

by Jeff Baker

The two of them could hear the crickets from the darkened trailer and they grinned.

Harve and Lucas had been best friends since Grade School and had been camping out in Harvey’s family’s old trailer parked in the side yard against the house since they were in Jnr. High.

Now they were in their twenties and had become more than friends. When Harve had come back in town from College, he and Lucas had decided to camp out in the trailer overnight. They made sure they locked the door.

Lucas started singing that old song with the lyric about renting a trailer and the two of them busted out laughing. They were lounging on the pull-out bed which was just big enough for two people. They were only wearing shorts.

“Remember Junior year?” Harve said. “The first time we ever…you know, right here?”

“Oh yeah,” Lucas said. “I remember. I’m just glad we didn’t make a lot of noise. And that your folks were away for the weekend.”

“Yeah, my folks,” Harve said. “Look, if we’re going to move in together we’re going to have to tell them. You know, about us.”

“We won’t be obvious,” Lucas said. “I mean, I’m not out yet and you certainly aren’t.”

“Yeah, but I don’t want to hide it from them,” Harve said, kissing Lucas. “Besides, they’ll find out eventually.”

“We don’t have to worry about that right now,” Lucas said, kissing Harve. “We’ll make it through this. We just have to…”

There was a banging on the side of the trailer.

“Guys, calm down,” came the voice. Harve’s Grandmother who was visiting his folks. “Everybody already knows and we’re fine with it.”

Harve and Lucas froze and gawked at each other.

“You need to close the side window of this trailer,” she said. “It’s up against the open window of the house and we can hear everything. Here.”

She tapped on the front door of the trailer.

“I got a bag of cookies for you, thought you’d be hungry. They’re safer than cigarettes.”

“Uh, thanks Grandma,” Harve said.

“Yeah, thanks,” Lucas said, trying not to laugh.

“Get ‘em before the dogs and raccoons do,” she said as she walked away.

“Oh,” she called back as she opened the kitchen door. “You two guys invite me to the wedding.”

Lucas stared at Harve for a moment. “I think we’re out,” he said.

“Yeah,” Harve said. “To the whole neighborhood.”

The two of them laughed as Harve went to get the cookies.

—end—

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The Poe Project: A Reading Report Addenda From Jeff Baker (April 25, 2024)

The Poe Project

A Reading Report Addenda, by Jeff Baker

April 25th, 2024.

Finally got back to reading some Edgar Allan Poe, focusing on reading some stories beyond the often-anthologized, constantly-adapted favorites on a list I made. I intend to read ALL his stories someday.

I read “Thou Art The Man,” title being a Biblical quote.

It involves Mr. Shuttleworthy who has vanished and is presumed murdered and Charles (“Old Charley”) Goodfellow (Name from Shakespeare?) who sets out to solve the case.

I had a few theories as to the identity of the culprit and what was going on (three of them in fact!) but I breezed past a telling clue early on in the story that would have explained everything!

The story was published in 1844 and there is some action to prove the killer’s identity which would not fly today but the earlier clue would be the sort of thing Ellery Queen and Edward D. Hoch would employ in their “fair play” detective stories. (Where the reader gets all the clues too!)

In reading about “Thou Art The Man,” I see it is regarded as an “inferior” detective story. Nothing could be further from the truth!

Poe was a master! This story proves it!

If he’d only lived to a ripe old age and written more mysteries; imagine what a fun collection that would be!

Here’s the list of the first stories on my Poe Project, marking off the ones I’ve read.

The Island of the Fay

Lionizing

“Thou Art the Man” —read!

The Imp of the Perverse—read!

Four Beasts in One

King Pest—read!

Von Kempelen and His Discovery—read!

The Assignation

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Progress Report; “Oscar Wilde’s Comma.” For April 20, 2024 (a bit late!) From Jeff Baker.

Progress Report, April 20th, 2024; Oscar Wilde’s Comma

From Jeff Baker

(Posting a bit late!)

Did the usual monthly and weekly flash fiction stories, piddled around and wrote on a few other things and plotted out a few others.

Wrote a Queer Sci-Fi Column for later down the schedule. (I like to have a nice backlog.)

Wrote a lot at the downtown library and tried to keep the cats off the keyboard at home!

Worked on “Love’s Not Time’s Fool,” the longer story I told myself I would finish before starting any other long story. I wrote a page or two this month as well as little paragraphs or sometimes just a line. Keep remembering the story about Oscar Wilde showing up at a cafe for lunch and he told a friend “I took a comma out.” When Wilde showed up for dinner he told his friend “I put the comma back in.”

Sometimes, the little stuff is progress too.

Actually wrote a poem here in the Library (where I’m writing this report) and grabbed a bunch of books to quote the Dewy Decimal numbers in the poem!

And earlier in the month, I went on a tear and did a mass submission one evening after reading that Ray Bradbury had suggested a writer should submit stories “to the least-likely market.” He told that to Dennis Etchison and Etchison sold a story in High School! So I submitted about six of my stories to various markets I scoped-out. Got a couple of rejections from that set but the rest are still out there.

“Don’t try to anticipate an editor’s needs, send it to the least likely market.” —Ray Bradbury.

And in related news, I found out that the Magazine of Fantasy And Science Fiction has not gone under, it’s still publishing! Hooray!!

That’s about it for now!

—-jeff baker, April 20, 2024

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Reading Report; April 20th, 2024, from Jeff Baker.

Reading Report: March/April 2024 from Jeff Baker

Okay, I didn’t read Poe this time around! Didn’t read a lot of any fiction this month. Except for the usual; the Kaje Harper stories and the Flash Fiction Draw Challenge stories (not by me!) one by Kenny Blasco and another by E. H. Timms: “The Adventures of a Little Peppermill.” Excellent.

Got a copy of the wonderful “Graphic” collection of Flash comic book stories from the Library (“The Flash: A Celebration Of 75 Years.” Re-read the Golden Age Flash stories I’d already read (didn’t remember reading them all!) including “Origin Of the Flash,” by Gardner Fox, “The Rival Flash” by John Broome (actually the last new Jay Garrick Flash story published for a while!) as well as two others that were from the same issue in the 40s. “The Planet Of Sport” I had not read. Great fun!

From the Barry Allen Flash’s Silver age I re-read the origin story “Mystery Of the Human Thunderbolt” by Robert Kanigher (a classic comics origin without tragedy!) Gardner Fox’s classic “Flash Of Two Worlds,” and Jim Shooter’s “Superman’s Battle With the Flash.”

The story I picked up the collection to read was “Death Of An Immortal” by Len Wein. I’d heard about it before (most recently in 13th Dimension) and it didn’t disappoint! Loads of cosmic fun with the Earths One and Two Flashes.

Also read “Stupendous Triumph Of the Six Super Villains” by John Broome.

Two later stories were basically character pieces featuring the Wally West incarnation of the Flash: “Happy Birthday, Wally” by Mike Baron, and “The Unforgiving Minute” by William Messner-Loebs. The latter actually deals with “Impostor Syndrome.”

As for prose fiction, I read Fritz Leiber’s “Kreativity For Kats,” (I have a kitty who spills the water bowl!) and started in on a couple of novels: Terrie Farley Moran and Jessica Fletcher’s fun new “Murder She Wrote” book “Murder Backstage.” It has Emma McGill, need I say more? Also ‘Nathan Burgoine’s “Triad Magic,” which prompted me to try a recipe for the classic Canadian dish Poutine!

I read through some of J. Scott Coatsworth’s book on writing “Suck A Little Happy Juice,” which I had read when he was putting it together and had read the columns they are culled from before.

Read Veronica Henry’s story “Guilt Can Wilt the Sweetest Flower” in the new issue (Winter 2024) of Magazine Of Fantasy And Science Fiction. (Which is still publishing!!! Hooray!!!!!)

Re-Read H.P. Lovecraft’s “Music Of Erich Zahn.” (Friend of mine mentioned it and I hadn’t read it since the early 90s.) I could see where some of it was going but it was a nice little chiller!

And I read a bit of David Dosa M.D.’s “book “Making Rounds With Oscar.”

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Rainbow Snippets Goes “Behind the Sealed Door.” April 19, 2024, from Jeff Baker.

April 19, 2024

Every week we post six lines from a work of ours, a work-in-progress or published or a recommendation of someone else’s work with at least one LGBT character. Posted at Rainbow Snippets here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/963484217054974

I based the story https://authorjeffbaker.com/2024/04/12/behind-the-sealed-door-by-jeff-baker-friday-flash-fics-for-april-12-2024/ on which these snippets are taken from the every-now-and-then real life happening where someone in an old building will find some jun…I mean, a relic from the past in an unused room. Here’s “Behind the Sealed Door.”

We were filling up at the Pic-Mart on the West side of town when Joey glanced across the street and saw the old building on the corner. Last time we’d been in the area the windows had been boarded up but now somebody was putting in new glass.

“Hey Bryant!” Joey said. “Didn’t you say you used to work over there?”

“Yeah, when I was in High School,” I said. “That was about twenty years ago back in the Nineties.”

“More like Thirty,” Joey said with a grin.

Okay, just a little bit more…

Joey had been born the year after I graduated High School. Despite a twenty-year age difference we’d hit it off when we were fixed up on a blind date and had been together almost ten years.

“Yeah, I worked for Old Man Higgins selling candy and whatnot before Pic-Mart came in and he sold the place and retired.” I said, watching the price zoom up on the pump.

“Hey, what was that you were telling me about when they knocked down a wall or something?” Josh asked.

“Oh yeah,” I said. “One of the shelves started to fall apart and Mr. Higgins had someone come out to replace it. They pulled out the whole case, shelves and all and found a door behind it what nobody had opened in years.”

A friend of mine thought the story was spooky and mysterious! I DID borrow the title from an ancient radio horror show “The Sealed Book.”

Next week, something spooky and mysterious! Till then, take care! ——–jeff

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“Stump The Band” With Friday Flash Fics From Jeff Baker. April 19th, 2024.

Stump The Band

by Jeff Baker

Dalton sat on the couch in his Brother’s basement sipping a soda. He glanced at the clock; 12:33 A. M.

“Okay,” Dalton said, tossing his book to the side. “Alberta…”

The little computer flickered to life, looking like a hockey puck with glowing blue highlights.

“…play the theme from ‘Bewitched.’”

“Looking…” said the artificial voice. “Playing. Theme from ‘Bewitched.’”

The familiar music filled the room and Dalton leaned back imagining the cute cartoon witch soaring around the basement, remembering afternoons in High School when he would watch afternoon reruns.

In a few minutes, the tune was finished.

“Alberta, play Gordon Jenkins’ ‘Manhattan Tower.’”

“Looking,” the computer voice said. “Playing. ‘Manhattan Tower.’”

“Ahhhhh!” Dalton said as the jazzy score filled the air. “I could go to sleep listening to this.”

In just a couple of minutes, the song finished.

“That’s it?” Dalton said. “Mom and Dad’s record of that lasted an hour.”

He thought a moment.

“Okay, Alberta, see if you know this one; Play ‘Vexations’ by Erik Satie.” Dalton smiled to himself. The piece bore the composer’s instructions to repeat it 840 times.

The melody played for about three minutes, then it was done.

Dalton wondered if Jean-Luc Picard’s computer did stuff like this.

“Okay,” Dalton said. “Alberta, play the ‘Fitzwilliam Virginal Book.’”

“Looking…looking…” Alberta said. Then, nothing.

“You don’t have that?” Dalton asked with a grin.

“Nobody’s perfect,” Alberta replied.

Dalton about jumped out of his skin. He stared at the speaker.

“Alberta, what did you just say?”

“Repeating…Looking…looking,” the computer voice said.

Dalton sat down and shook his head. He sighed. It was late.

“All right, Alberta. Play Errol Garner’s ‘Concert By the Sea.’”

—end—

Here’s Garner’s “Concert By the Sea.” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QSPXBMzlJIo&list=PL5cXl_IvbwiUUBEBmiILLrBd7WmU3IRye

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Burgers, Bedtime And Pepper: Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Stories For April 15, 2024, From Mike Mayak.

Hi, again! Mike here, also known as “Jeff Baker.”

The draws for the April 2024 FFDC were:

A Bedtime Story

Set at a Burger place

Involving a Pepper Mill

E. H. Timms wrote “The Adventures Of A Little Peppermill.” https://thinkingthinking123.blogspot.com/2024/04/flash-fic-challenge-adventures-of.html

Kenny Blasco wrote: “With Cat-Like Tread.” https://authorjeffbaker.com/2024/04/11/with-cat-like-tread-by-kenny-blasco-flash-fiction-draw-challenge-story-for-april-2024/

And I wrote: “Burgers and Fries.” https://authorjeffbaker.com/2024/04/08/burger-and-fries-flash-fiction-draw-challenge-story-from-jeff-baker-april-8th-2024/

Remember, it’s never too late to write a story of your own, post it in the comments and join in the fun!

We’ll be back with more draws and stories on May 6th, 2024 (!!!!) ——mike

Posted in E. H. Timms, Fiction, Kenny Blasco, LGBT, Mike Mayak, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Short-Stories, The Results | Leave a comment

More Snippets With “Atmosphere.” Rainbow Snippets From Jeff Baker, April 12th, 2024 (or thereabouts!)

Every week we post six lines from a work of ours, a work-in-progress or published or a recommendation of someone else’s work with at least one LGBT character. Posted at Rainbow Snippets here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/963484217054974

These snippets are from an early Flash Fics story “Atmosphere” from 2018, and I posted another snippet from it a couple of years ago. We meet Bryan and Nico as they are making out on a comfy blanket on the ground…I actually wrote a sequel about the characters and If I ever get motivated there could be a longer story in it somewhere! https://authorjeffbaker.com/2016/08/28/monday-flash-fic-for-august-29-2016-atmosphere/

“You know, I don’t even remember how this weekend started,” Nico said. “I don’t even know how I could afford to come to a place like this.”

“I remember,” Bryan said. “The acclimation thing didn’t work on me all the way. Sometimes it doesn’t.”

Nico sat up on his elbows.

“Wait, what ‘acclimation thing?’”

“Programming,” Bryan said. “They hooked you up to an, an encephalitic mind thingie. Programmed you,” he said flatly. “Me too.”

A little long, but here’s more snippets:

“We’re supposed to believe that this is really us, that this is how we really feel. It’s the programming. We were programmed to fall in love and get romantic and physical and, and, oh, God you have nice legs!”

Bryan started rubbing Nico’s leg, and playfully stuck a thumb under Nico’s shorts.

Okay, one more snippet…

“But who did this to us?” Nico asked. “Who messed with our minds and our emotions and played with us like we’re, we’re…”

“You did!” Bryan said. “We both signed up for this. We were hired,” Bryan said, nuzzling Nico’s neck. “People pay a lot to come to this romantic resort. We’re hired to add atmosphere. They pay us pretty well. But we always stop just short of, well, doing what the customers do when they get back to their rooms.”

Well! That was interesting! Click on the link “Atmosphere” at the bottom of the original story to read the sequel. Next week, our snippets open a door that had been sealed…

And on that mysterious note…——–jeff

Posted in Atmosphere, LGBT, Rainbow Snippets | 2 Comments

“Behind the Sealed Door” by Jeff Baker. Friday Flash Fics for April 12, 2024.

Behind the Sealed Door

by Jeff Baker

We were filling up at the Pic-Mart on the West side of town when Joey glanced across the street and saw the old building on the corner. Last time we’d been in the area the windows had been boarded up but now somebody was putting in new glass.

“Hey Bryant!” Joey said. “Didn’t you say you used to work over there?”

“Yeah, when I was in High School,” I said as I punched in our ZIP code at the gas pump. “That was about twenty years ago back in the Nineties.”

“More like Thirty,” Joey said with a grin.

Joey had been born the year after I graduated High School. Despite a twenty-year age difference we’d hit it off when we were fixed up on a blind date and had been together almost ten years.

“Yeah, I worked for Old Man Higgins selling candy and whatnot before Pic-Mart came in and he sold the place and retired.” I said, watching the price zoom up on the pump.

“Hey, what was that you were telling me about when they knocked down a wall or something?” Josh asked.

“Oh yeah,” I said. “One of the shelves started to fall apart and Mr. Higgins had someone come out to replace it. They pulled out the whole case, shelves and all and found a door behind it what nobody had opened in years.”

“Wow!” Joey said.

“The knob was busted, so they pried it open. I didn’t know what to expect; maybe a dead body or Narnia.”

Joey laughed at that.

“Well, what we found was a little storeroom, about the size of our bathroom at home.”

“Not that big, huh?” Joey said.

I laughed. I had regularly stood in front of the bathroom mirror while Joey stood in the empty bathtub shaving.

“Yeah.” I said. “It was dusty and dark with cobwebs and a lightbulb in the ceiling that still worked, amazingly. And on the floor was one of those old wooden boxes they used to ship stuff in, not too big but it was full of old magazines.”

“Magazines?” Joey asked.

“Yeah.” I said, watching the pump. “Old science-fiction and adventure magazines and a bunch of old comic books. Dating back to 1946!”

“Wow!” Joey said. “What happened to them?”

“Ricky, the other kid I worked with, he said he wanted them and Mr. Higgins sold them to Ricky for ten bucks, and told him he wanted that box back.” I topped off the gas and put the hose back in the pump.

“Ten bucks?” Joey said laughing.

“Yeah.” I said. “Mr. Higgins said they were trash and nobody would be dumb enough to buy them.”

“Oh my gosh!” Joey said.

“Ricky sold them for about two hundred bucks,” I said. “The local paper did an article on him and Mr. Higgins was so mad he fired him!”

“I’ll bet he didn’t care!” Joey said laughing.

“Well, anyway a year or so later Pic-Mart opened this store and Mr. Higgins decided to retire.” I said. “That was after he’d scoured his store for more old magazines!”

—end—

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“With Cat-Like Tread,” By Kenny Blasco. Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Story For April 2024.

With Cat-Like Tread

by Kenny Blasco

(April 7, 2024)

MODERATOR’S NOTE: My friend Kenny Blasco sent this to me as an e-mail. It’s not the kind of thing he usually writes, and since he doesn’t have a blog or website, I’m posting it here. He says it was inspired by the kitty picture. Enjoy!—-mike

“Awwwww! One more story!” the First kitten said.

The Second Kitten said “Yeah, one more!”

There was a chorus of mewling kittens and Mama Cat hushed them.

“Okay, one more,” Mama Cat said. “Back when one of your Dads and I were living under a porch there was a burger place across the street.”

The First Kitten asked “What’s a burger place?”

“Something that smells wonderful,” Mama cat said. “One night, late when the people were all asleep your Dad and I crept over to the burger place.

The Second Kitten asked “Which Dad was this?”

“Tom,” said Mama Cat. “But they’re all named Tom. Anyway, he and I found the dumpster, the big thing out back where they throw away food.”

“Throw away?” That was the Third Kitten.

“Yes. And it’s full of goodies. We crawled up the wooden fence behind the dumpster and saw it was piled high with food and trash. And remember, always look before you jump in, if the dumpster is empty you have no way to climb back up the metal walls.”

The Second Kitten said “Wow!”

“We feasted on meat and cheese and even chicken pieces. Then Tom found something strange: It was long and wooden but too smooth to claw. But he pawed at it and it fell against the wall of the dumpster with a bang and broke open spewing pepper!”

The Third Kitten said “Eeeeeewwwwww!!!!”

“Tom and I started sneezing and suddenly there was a rustle from under the food and another cat jumped up, sneezing. We looked at each other for a moment and then we jumped out of the dumpster and ran home.”

The First Kitten asked “What was that thing?”

“I think it was a thing humans use to put pepper on food, but Tom thought that it was a trap laid for cats to keep them out of the food they think belongs to them.” Mama Cat said. “All right! Off with you! Bedtime!”

The kittens crawled into the warm, cozy nest under the prickly bushes. When they were sleeping, Mama Cat went searching for another dumpster.

And maybe Tom.

The End

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