Monday Flash Fics for February 4, 2018 by Jeff Baker–Something Ecco-Friendly

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Captain Ecology and the Cavern of Doom

By Jeff Baker

 

The Ecolo-Car in hover mode floated over the forest, just high enough for the two men to lower themselves in front of the cave entrance.

“Golly, Captain Ecology,” said the younger man, wearing inconspicuous yellow shorts, a purple shirt and a cape. “Are you sure The Asphyxiator has his hideout in those caves?”

“Positive, Compost Boy!” said the older man, wearing a similar outfit, except with long pants. “And if my sources are correct…”

“And they usually are!” Compost Boy said, grinning.

“…The Asphyxiator is in there, getting ready to launch his scheme for world domination,” Captain Ecology said. “To say nothing of ruining this pristine environment.”

“And really hacking-off the National Park Service,” Compost Boy said. “We’ve been trying to nail the Asphyxiator since he tried to wreck the first Earth Day celebration five years ago. So do we go in there and bust some heads?”

“We sneak in. Through the front,” Captain Ecology said as they stealthily slipped down the ropes and ducked behind the bushes next to the cavern entrance.

The cavern entrance was wide but the ceiling lowered after a few yards and became dark even though it was bright midday outside. Fortunately, Captain Ecology and Compost Boy were able to see in all but the dimmest light.

“You notice something?” Compost Boy whispered. “This is a super villain’s lair but it’s unguarded. No guards, no henchmen, no booby traps.”

“If he’s doing what I think he is he would have thought traps unnecessary and probably couldn’t hire any guards or henchmen.”

Oh, that just reassures me no end, Compost Boy thought.

They turned a corner and found a small door. Holding up a hand, Captain Ecology opened it, leading them into a large, vaulted cavern filled with cabinets, scientific equipment and a nasty-looking machine topped with what looked like four tubas pointing upward. Standing beside it, wearing a gas mask and standard black supervillain robes was The Asphyxiator.

“Hold it right there you fiend!” Captain Ecology shouted.

“Too late!” The Asphyxiator cackled. “I have already activated this device, one which shall let me rule the world! And you and your juvenile partner will be its first victims!”

“Hey!” Compost Boy yelled. “I’m twenty-six years old! I just look young!”

The machine was sputtering and shaking. Compost Boy’s eyes began to water. Captain Ecology let out a cough.

“What is that stuff?” Compost Boy said.

“A mixture of methane and other gasses,” Captain Ecology began. The Asphyxiator interrupted.

“All natural ingredients, I assure you! A more intense combination of the same ones found in the human body!”

“Oh, God! I thought this smelled familiar!” Compost Boy said, coughing. “Let’s get out of here and find some air!”

“The Ecco-Domine Serum that enhanced our own abilities unfortunately heightened our sense of smell, so I agree for the time being!” Captain Ecology said. “This way!”

The pair raced back out the door, as Captain Ecology kept talking.

“This cavern is perfectly shaped and positioned for those noxious fumes to be spread to the neighboring towns, then the cities beyond, unless I can remember where I; aha!” He stopped by an incongruous metal door to one side of the caverns corridors, and pulled it open. “Just as I thought!” He walked in and quickly pulled a lever. “Now, we wait outside.”

A few minutes later, The Asphyxiator, coughing and gagging staggered out the main entrance of the cavern into the waiting handcuffs of Captain Ecology and Compost Boy.

“Golly, Captain Ecology!” Compost Boy said. “What did you do?”

“Every supervillian’s secret underground lair is equipped with a functioning ventilation system,” said Captain Ecology. “I spotted the control and turned it off.”

“How did you know that would affect him?” Compost Boy asked. “He was wearing a gas mask!”

“A defective one,” Captain Ecology said. “I recognized the brand right off; they’ve been recalled by the manufacturer.”

 

—end—

Author’s Note: Influenced by a lot of the ecology commercials on T.V. in the 1970’s. I was reading a lot of comic books and I may have dreamed the characters up back then. I forgot about it all until maybe a couple of years ago. I may write up more about these two if I ever have the time!

 

 

Posted in Captain Ecology and Compost Boy, Fantasy, Fiction, Monday Flash Fiction, Science Fiction, Uncategorized | 9 Comments

Friday Flash Fics for February 2, 2018 by Jeff Baker

26908008_197050297704432_110624270397404164_n                                                            We’re All In Our Places With Bright Shining Faces                                                                                                      By Jeff Baker

 

There was something a little frightening about Doctor Straw, Arlecchino  Martinelli thought. Not just his ability to squeeze through the smallest opening as a seemingly wind-blown cloud of yellowish straw; more his grim appearance. The face like a shock of wheat with eye slits and a mouth. Arlecchino thought this as he watched Doctor Straw re-form inside the Teacher’s Lounge. Not as frightening as those kids in A-21. He suppressed a smile.

“I’ve had it,” Straw said in his hollow voice. “Absolutely had it! I fought the Villains United Coalition; even went up against the Crisis Squad that time they turned bad, but I refuse to spend another minute in there with those incorrigible delinquents.”

“I thought you said there are no bad nascent superheroes, only misunderstood…” Arlecchino began with a grin.

“Stuff it!” Straw said. “We should sic those, those, those…”

“”Youthfully exuberant…” Arlecchino began again.

“Oh, come on! Leave him alone!” Ezekiel Bert said, setting down his coffee. “You have a body that’s built like a tank, literally…” Arlecchino Martinelli flexed his right arm, watching the steel ripple. “…and I have my Leonine form. Doctor Straw is, well, straw. Give him a break.”

“Those kids barely have their powers and I became a strawstorm and I still couldn’t control them.” Doctor Straw grumbled. “Somehow, they ganged up on me.”

“They’re the remedial education class, remember?” Arlecchino said. “They’re irresponsible kids, not a grad school study hall. These kids aren’t used to knuckling down.”

“But you need to treat them like people, not like inmates,” Ezekiel said.

“Maybe you’re right,” Doctor Straw said. “After all, nobody ever said teaching kids at a High School for aspiring superheroes was going to be easy.”

“Tell you what,” Arlecchino said. “Keep your signaler on; if the kids become unmanageable, give us a call.  We’re not too far.”

“Darn shame Hypnos retired,” Ezekiel said. “Those kids wouldn’t give him any trouble.”

Hypnos had retired on the verge of having a nervous breakdown after a semester in A-21, Arlecchino thought. The year before they hired Doctor Straw and Ezekiel.

It was half-past one when the signaler in Arlecchino’s belt buzzed. He excused himself from his class and ran down the hall to Room A-21. He saw Ezekiel midway between his human and Leonine forms.

“They’re not there!” Ezekiel said. “The kids or Doctor Straw! The signal came from outside.”

As Ezekiel and Arlecchino ran outside, they were greeted by Doctor Straw’s voice.

“Heymph! Uffer hurrr! Uffr hurrr!”

Propped on the hood of a parked car, Doctor Straw’s straw head clenched the signaler between his teeth. He spat it out and glared at Ezekiel and Arlecchino.

“Don’t just stand there! Help put me back together!”

“What happened?” Ezekiel growled in his leonine form.

“What do you think happened?” Straw yelled. “Those kids happened! I turned into a strawstorm and one of them moved like lightning and scattered me all over the grounds! Too far for me to re-assemble by myself.”

“So what do we do?” Arlecchino asked, trying not to laugh.

“Go get the rest of me!” Straw snapped. “They threw my legs over there, and my arm over there, and my hand over there and my…”

And suddenly, the metal man and the lion began to laugh.

 

—end—

 

 

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Science Fiction, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Looking at artwork: Monday Flash Fiction by Jeff Baker, January 29, 2018.

26907595_10155976964024787_3731194612280354274_n                                                                Arrangement In Black and Gray                                                                                                                     By Jeff Baker                             

            “Here’s why I wanted you to come here to the gallery today,” Ajuliano said.

            “Wow!” Andy said, staring at the drawing on the wall. “Arrangement in Black and Grey; Latin Youth, 1926.”

            “You’re not looking at the picture,” Ajuliano said, grinning and pointing a finger.

            “Huh? Oh. Woah!” The muscular blonde man in the purple tank top gaped at the drawing on the wall; staring just slightly over the viewer’s left shoulder. Close-cropped hair, thin nose, glittering eyes, firm mouth.

            Andy stared back and forth between the drawing and Ajuliano. The face in the drawing was almost identical to Ajuliano, who Andy had backed up against. The taller man grinned and rubbed the shorter man’s arm.

            “That’s you!” Andy said looking up at Ajuliano.

            “Yeah, it is!” Ajuliano laughed. “No, I’m about sixty-five years too young to have been in that painting. I saw this when I was in the gallery a few weeks ago and I had to show somebody.”

            “Think it’s one of your family?” Andy asked.

            “Don’t know,” Ajuliano said. “I only know my Mom came from Chicago. I don’t go back any further. Not even sure I know who the artist is.”

            “Raymond DuPass,” Andy read, squinting at the card by the painting.

            “Let me make a pass,” Ajuliano said, running his hand through Andy’s blond hair.

            Andy grinned and kissed him. “Careful, we’re in public!”

            “So let’s stop being in public,” Ajuliano said grinning back. “My place is right near here.”

            “We’ve known each other what, four hours?” Andy said.

            “Yeah. Happy anniversary! Sure you want to be with an old man like me?”

            “You’re what? Forty?” Andy asked.

            “Closer to five-hundred and forty,” Ajuliano said grinning again. “I’m really a succubus.”

            “Hey, it’s my bus and you can…” Andy began, as they both started laughing again.

            They kissed again and walked out of the gallery, the drawing staring after them.

It was later in the afternoon when a small group of art students wandered through the gallery.

“This one’s by Raymond DuPass,” a young man in the group said.

“Who’s he?” asked someone else.

“Raymond DuPass,” the young man began in a mock-serious tone. “American expatriate, One of the Barcelona School in the early Twentieth Century, relocated here to California.” The young man grinned. “And grew up where I was raised in Kansas City. Best known for his sculpture, his paintings and drawings are comparatively rare. He had an eye for male models whom he was rumored to dally with.” He laughed, and looked at the card again. “Wow. 1926. He died later that year. Probably right after he did this.”

“What happened?”

“I dunno,” the young man said. “I read somewhere that he seemed to age overnight. Hey, they’re showing the Bernecky mural here!”

“You really get into this stuff, don’t you?”

“Yeah,” he said as they walked to the next room, the drawing staring silently from the wall.

 

                                                       —end—

 

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Horror, LGBT, Monday Flash Fiction, Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Friday Flash Fics, January 26, 2018, by Jeff Baker. A tale with an oceanfront view…

26903715_193404984735630_587372210355527985_n                                                                          Let’s Get Away From It All                                                                                                                                  By Jeff Baker

 

            “Man! Look at that view!” Steve said, staring out the window at the ocean. “And we can see it from inside in a hot tub!”

            “Yeah!” Mickey said. “As beachfront properties go, even rental properties, this is a steal!”

            It would be a steal at twice the price. A house opening out onto a pristine beach. It would be a steal even without the beach. Two-story, well-furnished, plenty of room. Open, lit and airy, done in what would have been called a modern style sixty years before when the house was built.

            Then there was the hot tub. Built into the floor, surrounded by stone and looking for all the world like a big, ceramic coffee cup. (“Nothing like getting into a hot cup of coffee in the morning,” Steve had cracked when he’d first seen it.)

            Mr. Wilson, the real estate agent, had been extolling the finer points of the house while leading the pair through the downstairs and to the upstairs bedroom which had a fine view of the ocean. As they gazed out they automatically held hands.

            “What do you think?” Mickey asked when Mr. Wilson was out of earshot.

            “It looks nice,” Steve said, but we wouldn’t be living here, just staying here now and then.”

            “Yeah, but what about the low price?” Mickey asked. “Too good to be true?”

            “You mean, like termites?” Steve said.

            “Big water bugs?” Mickey said.

            “Loud neighbors?” Steve said.

            “I suppose you’re wondering,” Wilson said walking back in the room, “how we can offer this at such a low price. It’s not really a secret…”

            “Here it comes,” Steve whispered to Mickey.

            “…at least, not on the island,” Wilson continued.

            “It is to us,” Mickey whispered to Steve.

            “But you know how people sensationalize.” Wilson said.

            “About what?” Mickey and Steve said in unison.

            “The house is supposed to be haunted.” Wilson blurted out. The two men stared at him.

            “Uh, I don’t believe in ghosts,” Mickey said.

            “Nonetheless, I feel obligated to inform you that the average tenancy in this house is about three days. Some of them don’t even stay the whole night.” Wilson said.

            Steve looked around the room. It was bright, cheery, no shadows.

            “Where’s the rental agreement?” Steve asked. Mickey smiled, but not as broadly as Wilson.

            The house was softly lit, the dusk was sinking into a deep black outside and from the hot tub Mickey and Steve could see tiki torches on the far end of the beach and hear music playing.

            “Sinatra, I think,” Steve said, sipping the last of his glass of wine as he snuggled next to Mickey in the warm water of the hot tub. Mickey grinned. He could see the glimmer of the distant lights reflected in the water of the hot tub. He stared closer.

            “Hey, Steve, are you wiggling your toes?”

            “I can if you want me to!” Steve said, finishing the wine.

            “Nah, hold up a minute, hold still,” Mickey said. “One, two, three four…five…”

            “Toes?” Steve said glancing down. They looked up at each other, their mouths open wide. An instant later, they had jumped out of the hot tub.

            “It wasn’t a shadow,” Mickey said.

            “No, it wasn’t,” Steve said.

            “Five feet,” Mickey breathed. “Your two, my two and…and…”

            “It’s gone,” Steve said.

            “Yeah,” Mickey said.

            “How far’s that motel, Mick?”

            “Not far if we drive,” Mickey said. “Let’s grab some clothes, quick. And for gosh sakes turn on the lights!”

            Twenty minutes later they walked into the lobby of the Beach Ways Motel. The desk clerk looked up, eyed their rumpled clothes and hastily packed beach bag with the clothes sticking out of the sides and smiled pleasantly.

            “Rented the LuMarro place, I see?”

 

                                    —end—

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Horror, LGBT, Uncategorized | 4 Comments

For Monday Flash Fics: An Encounter With Frivolity, by Jeff Baker. January 21, 2018.

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                                               With Bells and Motley

                                                           By Jeff Baker                                                                      

            The city is old and familiar. But all cities, all places are familiar to me. I glance casually at the people walking along the street. Some of them eye me curiously, some of them are smiling. I smile to myself at that.

            Fashions have changed (of course) and at times I feel there is as much difference between different countries and different centuries. I have worn the most outlandish outfits as well as sober grey flannel. I have been plainly seen presiding over my special area of human frailty and strength. In the days of knights in armor I was in bells and motley, but I also was seen in ermine robes as well as running naked in the woods. I have been to funerals in a burst of sudden good feeling and nostalgia and once, in this very city, I was in the wings on opening (also closing) night of an unfunny stage comedy, where the conversation between the playwright and the stagehand was funnier than anything the audience was being subjected to. I hope the playwright took what little hints I could give as to subject matter for a next endeavor. I don’t drop hints very often, though I have dropped people’s pants unexpectedly.

            I am an Embodiment, what some called a Teraphim, a personification, of something considered insubstantial. The depiction of Death, with a skull-face and black hooded robes is one such being. Father Time is another. I am laughter. I am humor. Frivolity and satire. And I take many forms in many places. I have been in hospitals, on playgrounds and in prisons of all sorts. I have literally been gallows humor.

            So, why am I here in this place at this moment? There. That young man at the table, at the outdoor café. The one with the drawing pad. He has drawn me here.

            Because he is thinking about me.

            He is talking to his friends about me. And he has drawn a picture. It doesn’t look like I appear now, nor is it dressed like I do today. No white jacket, no hat, no carrying bag. In the drawing I am wearing bells and motley, the exact same pattern as I wore long ago. The drawing is not a surprise. We are not entirely unknown, and there are some people who are sensitive to us. This young man is one of them I am certain.

            In the drawing, I am behind the wheel of a fancy car, a convertible. A well-drawn car, a car of at least four decades earlier. My drawn counterpart is laughing, and so is the young man at the table with his friends as he points to something.

            The license plate at the rear of the car. It does not have numbers, but is one of the recent, personalized variety. The term on the plate is a new one, just a few years old; LOL.

            It makes me smile.

 

                                                —end—

 

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Monday Flash Fiction, Uncategorized | 2 Comments

A Song for a Shutdown

With the current government shutdown, I’ve been thinking about the one about 1991 during the first Bush administration. Congress looked silly and petty and the president came off smelling like a rose. And I did this song at a comedy club in town which went over well!

                                           Shutdown 

                               By Jeff Baker, circa about 1990

                        (To the tune of T.V. theme from “Rawhide.”)

 

            Keep Movin’, movin’, movin’

            Voters disapprovin’

            Incumbents they’re removin’

            Let’s hide!

            We’ve been enterprisin’

            And we’ve been compromisin’

            But Bush has the veto on his side

            Federal employees-a-waitin’

            For paycheck satiation

            They’ll vote us out by-and-by.

 

            Keep rollin’, rollin’, rollin’

            Budget bucks are swollen

            Looks like it’s been stolen

            Let’s hide!

            Not quite like we planned it

            In D.C. Boy Scouts are stranded

            Wishin’ that they could find tour guides!

            All the things we’re missin’

            That last week we were dissin’

            We’ll be voted out by-and-by.

 

            Vote ‘em in, vote ‘em out, vote ‘em in, save our butts

            Hopin’ it saves our hides!

            Veto in, veto out, veto in, veto out

            Hope that we can save our hides!

 

                        —end—

Posted in Political satire, Songs | Leave a comment

A Ride in the Sky for Friday Flash Fics, by Jeff Baker, January 19, 2018

                                           The Skycruiser

                                                By Jeff Baker

                                   

            “Woah! Hey! Lookout!!” Kyle-Four jumped in his seat and alternated between pointing and covering his eyes.

            “Relax! I’ve got this!” Scott-Two said, as the skycruiser moved into the next airlane. “I’ve been driving for a while!” He steered the skycruiser into position as they soared past the tops of the downtown skyscrapers. “It’s actually pretty easy!”

            “Keep your eye on the line, dude!” Kyle-Four yelled in near-panic.

            “Hey! It’s chillib, Bro!” Scott-Two said. “Besides, the monitor does most of the flying, remember?”

            “Oh, yeah,” Kyle-Four said, settling back into his seat. “I keep forgetting.”

            The skycruiser arced above the city, following the rest in a line.

            “I got my assignment this morning,” Kyle-Four said, staring out the passenger side window.

            “Yeah?” Scott-Two said, his hands clenching the control disc. “What did they say?”

            “Girls,” Kyle-Four said still staring out the window. “I’m gonna like girls.” He turned to Scott-Two with a sad smile. “For the rest of my life.”

            “When…when’s the…” Scott-Two started to say, his mouth hanging open.

            “Acclimation?” Kyle-Four said. “Mine’s set for Frostday at 11:16 in the morning.”

            “Two days. Aw, Horus, two days.” Scott-Two said.

            “Look, I’ll always remember what we, you know, had…” Kyle-Four said.

            “But you won’t feel it anymore!” Scott-Two yelled, banging his fist on the dashboard.  The monitor didn’t even let the skycruiser jiggle.

            “But I’ll remember,” Kyle-Four said again, wondering how he really would feel then. “How about you?” Kyle-Four asked. “I mean, any word when your, you know, Acclimation is gonna be?”

            “Already happened,” Scott-Two said. “I turned twenty-two last month, remember?”

            “And?” Kyle-Four asked, his jaw dropping.

            “Same as I always was,” Scott-Two said in a flat voice. “Same as the last time we…you know. That’s why I didn’t bother telling you.”

            The two of them sat back in their seats and let the monitor do the flying. Kyle-Four slid his hand across the armrest and touched Scott-Two’s hand. They flew in silence.

            “We…have two days before I have to…you know.” Kyle-Four said.

            Scott-Two turned to Kyle-Four and grinned, squeezing Kyle-Four’s hand.

            “You know, for now I’m happy with this.” Scott-Two said.

            “It’s chillib, Bro, It’s chillib.” Kyle-Four said.

             

 

                                               —end—

 

Posted in Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, LGBT, Science Fiction, The Skycruiser | 2 Comments

A Librarian Story for Friday Flash Fics., by Jeff Baker. January 12, 2018

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The Library of Babel                                                                                                                               (A Coffee Man Story)

                                                                      By Jeff Baker                                                                                              We were having our usual after-work beer and game of pool at Merle’s Bar when Billy started laughing about something he’d seen. Some guy walking down the street wearing a t-shirt that identified him as a librarian while his arms were covered in tattoos. He laughed saying he’d never seen a librarian who looked like he belonged in a biker bar before.

            That led to a loud “Harrrumph” from the far end of the bar.

            We called him the Coffee Man. Not to his face, but he was usually in Merle’s when we were, sitting at the bar and reading the paper over endless refills of coffee. He claimed to have been some kind of government agent and we had no reason to disbelieve him.

            “Young people today doubtless don’t even see the life of a librarian as full of intrigue and adventure,” he said, “but I had an experience several years ago that belies all of that.”

            It was just before I retired from the Company (the Coffee Man said) and I was attending a lecture at a public library. The speaker identified himself as the head librarian from a university I had never heard of and he said this made him an expert on his subject. That subject was; how libraries were now dangerous for children and they were sources of all sorts of inaccurate and politically slanted information. How these were not the libraries we had grown up with, and how the only recourse, unpleasant as it may be, was to shut down public and school libraries across the country.

            I realize how this sounds, but he came off as charming and presented his argument in a rational way, backed-up with charts and graphs full of numbers which I doubted most of the people in the audience were following. The speaker was of the most dangerous type; able to convince his audience of the most preposterous assertions by virtue of his credentials. Finally, after his seemingly interminable presentation he opened up the floor for a Q and A.

            Naturally, I was the only person who stood up.

            My question was simple; I asked him if he’d ever been aware of practitioners of Library Science. (A gamble, I realize.)

            He stared at me and then confidently stated that he wasn’t going to, as he put it, “bend to popular academic trends.”

            That was when I asked him about his University background. He gave another glib answer and mentioned some degree in some form of theology. And that was when I suggested to the moderator that the speaker was not what he was presenting himself to be and they should ask him to leave. And they did.

            “And,” the Coffee Man said, “As I’m sure you figured out why, I shall retire to my newspaper.”

            The Coffee Man turned back to the paper he had spread out on the bar, waving for another refill of his coffee cup. Billy of course, was demanding an explanation.

            “Okay, my Mom’s a school librarian, so I know what library science is, but he didn’t need a degree in it to be a real librarian. What made you think that guy wasn’t legit?”

            “As you explained,” the Coffee Man said, “it isn’t necessary to have a degree in it to be a librarian, but this man was not able to explain that as well as you. The fact that he could not exposed him to me as a phony.”

 

                                                —end—

 

 

 

Posted in Coffee Man, Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Mystery, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

More Flash Fiction by Jeff Baker for ‘Nathan Burgoine’s first monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge; January 8, 2018.

‘Nathan Burgoine has started a Flash Fiction Challenge of his own, modeled after the NYC Midnight Flash Fiction Challenge. The idea is; ‘Nathan draws three random cards which correspond to an object, a genre and a setting. Writers put those three things into a 1000 word story, due in a week. In this case, the three draws were for a tattoo machine, a fairy tale (as the genre) and a prison (as the setting.) Having written my share of prison stories, I couldn’t pass this one up! The object is to have fun, which I did! See if you can guess which fairy tale I’m riffing on! Here’s the story, all about someone called

Reynaldo

By Jeff Baker

Life in the Scolfield Correctional Facility was pretty much routine, but Joey figured he’d use his time to better himself.  Joey’s idea of bettering himself involved getting a new tattoo. He’d spent the last three years working out in the prison weight room, so he figured his arms were big enough for a major ink project.

“A motorcycle race,” he’d outlined to his cellies. “With bikes and smoke and speed and skulls.”

Unfortunately, the arts project Joey was outlining was beyond the scope of his circle of acquaintances, to say nothing of his budget. And that’s when he heard one of the other cons showing off one of his tatts and talking up the con that’d done the artwork.

Of course, it cost. Big. The tatt artist called himself Reynaldo and he only took people he wanted or needed something from.  After asking around and calling in some favors Joey finally got a message delivered, supposedly to Reynaldo. Reynaldo’s cell was in A-Block, the part of the prison reserved for “special care” inmates. The guard unlocked the gate to D Block and let Joey in without a word. Joey wondered what strings the other con had pulled.

Reynaldo’s cell was at the far end of the top tier. Blankets covered the bars and cell door, against the rules in the main part of the prison but probably not here. Joey stepped up to the cell and a hand shoved a fold in the blanket aside.

“You’re Joey, right?” the man said. Joey tried not to stare. Reynaldo was seated in a small wheelchair in the middle of a cell crammed with table, steel bunk and toilet. Reynaldo looked about seventy, he was short, and had no legs. His face was a mass of wrinkles, like a light tan prune.  And all around the cell hung drawings and sketches, some in pencil, some in pen, at least one that looked like it had been drawn in blood. Joey was no expert, but he guessed the drawings were of museum quality.

“Yeah,” Joey said. “You Reynaldo?”

“Who else would I be?” Reynaldo said. “You’re here for ink.” It was a statement, not a question. “What are you into?”

Joey outlined his idea of the motorcycle race, the smoke, the wheels, everything.

“Can you do that?” Joey asked.

“I can do anything,” Reynaldo said. He rolled his chair back (not a lot of room to wheel around in here, wonder if he ever gets out of his cell, Joey thought) and reached behind the toilet and pulled out a bag wrapped in dirty rags. Out of that he pulled a cylinder that looked like a thin metal box wired to a grubby tire pressure gage. He squeezed one side of the box and the machine buzzed. Joey caught a glimpse of a needle at one end of the tire gauge. “The consultation and this first bit are free,” Reynaldo said. “It’ll take a while, and you’ll pay as you go. Violate the rules and it all comes crashing down.”

Joey glanced down at the I.D. badge all the inmates had clipped to their shirts and read the name.

“Caesar Soler, huh? How’d you get Reynaldo?”

“So-LAR.   It’s Spanish. Like me. And it isn’t my real name,” Reynaldo said. “A sorcerer’s name has power, and he has to hide that power.”

“Sorcerer, huh?” Joey grinned.

“This is sorcery,” Reynaldo said, holding up the tattoo machine. It wasn’t buzzing but the needle seemed to shimmer and glisten like moonlight. “And sorcery can vanish. Poof!” He let go of the machine, caught it with a swipe of his hand in the air and placed it back in its bag. “Session’s over. Next one will cost you.”

True to his word, the next time Joey showed up at Reynaldo’s cell, he demanded payment. Payment in information.  “Knowledge is power to a sorcerer.” Joey was no snitch, but this was business. Besides, Joey kept his eyes and ears open and his mouth shut. He figured this was why he got accepted into Reynaldo’s exclusive little club. Besides, he figured Reynaldo was crazy. No harm done.

But Joey got curious. He started wondering about Reynaldo. From the prison number on Reynaldo’s I.D. badge, Joey figured out that he’d been locked-up for at least twenty years. From muttered hints during the tattoo sessions, Joey guessed he had taken another man’s name and was doing someone else’s time. Reynaldo had also muttered something about “location,” and “a sorcerer needs a cave.”

The bound copies of the newspaper in the prison library went back past twenty years so Joey figured he might be able to find what he’d hoped to find: NO CHARGES FILED IN MAN’S DISSAPEARANCE. Joey read through it twice. He glanced down at his arm and flexed his bicep. The tattoo was looking good. Bikes charging in and out of the smoke and dust. He could almost hear engines roaring

The next morning, Reynaldo quizzed Joey for the latest on a small-time drug dealer who had just bought himself a month in the hole. Joey looked up and grinned.

“How about we finish this and it’s on you,” Joey said. “Or I tell people you’re really a disappeared recluse from Ivor, Kansas named,” he paused for effect, “Vernon Glick.”

Joey didn’t expect the cold wind that ripped the drawings off the wall, his last backward glance was of Reynaldo screaming, slouching down in his wheelchair as if he was shrinking, waving the tattoo machine over his head, the silver tip shining like a sorcerer’s wand.

Word was that Reynaldo had left the facility. Official story was he’d been transferred out in the middle of the night. Unofficial story was that an inmate with no legs and confined to a wheelchair had vanished from a maximum security prison and taken all his drawings with him.

And the elegant tattoo on Joey’s arm now looked like a child’s drawing of cereal and spilled milk.

 

—end—

 

 

 

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Uncategorized | 9 Comments

Short, short story for Monday Flash Fics, by Jeff Baker. January 8, 2018

26166529_10155922295829787_614311529540696717_n                                                                                 The Cottage

By Jeff Baker

Years later I went back to Pending, Kansas and drove past the stone house. It was much the same; it still looked like a cottage in a fairy tale. I wondered if the new owners had made a lot of changes. I wondered if my old room was still upstairs to the one side. And most of all I wondered if the cistern in the back yard was still tightly sealed, the way we left it twenty years ago.

I debated about going around to the back and checking it but I thought the better of it. Besides, the sun was shining, birds were singing and life was continuing.

So I knew the cistern was sealed and what was in there, trapped under the ground was still there.

For now.

 

—end—

 

Author’s Note: The first lines are a variation on the opening of C.L. Moore & Henry Kuttner’s story “Call Him Demon.” I couldn’t resist that or the picture. I thought I was just going to do the opening of a story but this one feels complete! —-jeff baker, 1/6/18

 

 

 

 

Posted in Fiction, Monday Flash Fiction, Uncategorized | 1 Comment