“All The Bells And Whistles.” Friday Flash Fics From Jeff Baker. (March 14, 2025)

Posted on March 14, 2025 by jeffbaker307

All the Bells And Whistles

by Jeff Baker

“Wow,” Steve Jones breathed, looking around the small garage which opened onto a side street. “How long has it been since we started hanging out here?”

“High School,” Corby Austin said, sipping a soda. “Remember? We had that school project due and we walked over from school to your house to work on it out here.”

“Yeah, and you guys grabbed me because I had the car and you needed to get that thing you two built back to school,” Horacio Owen said.

“And because you’re my cousin,” Corby said.

“And because Mom told me to,” Horacio laughed. “Wow Fifteen years ago.”

Corby finished his soda with a characteristic slurp, crumpled the can and tossed it into the bucket with the others.

“Two points!” Horacio said.

“Yeah.” Corby said. “It’s one point when I have to go over, pick it up from the floor and toss it in.”

After a moment, Steve took a deep breath. “Sooooo, what do you guys think of Lance?”

“He seems nice,” Corby said.

“And tall,” Horacio said. “And wayyyyy to good-looking for you!”

They laughed again.

“Thanks!” Steve said. “You know, he doesn’t think he’s that good-looking.”

“Yeah, right!” Horacio laughed.

Steve had invited them to lunch with Lance the day before. It had gone well, Steve had introduced Horacio and Corby as “My straight best bros,” and they had hit it off. Steve had been nervous as hell, but everything had been fine, even the burgers.

Steve looked around the garage again and smiled. “I really can’t believe we’re doing this.”

“Doing what?” Horacio asked. “Getting hitched?”

Steve looked over, surprised. “It’s written all over my face, isn’t it?”

“You two were holding hands under the table,” Corby said.

“Yeah,” Steve said with a grin. “We got a license and were planning on this coming fall. Big wedding. Reception. All the bells and whistles. But we decided, you know, we’d better speed it up. We wanna do it next weekend.” Steve took another deep breath. “My folks are gone, and my cousins live out in California so would you two be there? Kinda best men, family, standing up for me, witnesses kind of thing?”

“Hell, yeah” Corby said.

“Same here, bro” Horacio said. “Whad’ you think, we wouldn’t want to be there?”

The three twenty-somethings hugged, stumbling awkwardly around the riding mower in the middle of the floor.

“Look, I just want to thank you guys for doing this again,” Steve said.

“Hey, no prob! ‘Sokay” the two others chorused.

“Hey! We can hold the reception here!” Horacio said.

“Yeah, right! We’d have to move the riding mower!” Corby said. “Dad doesn’t allow it to leave the garage until spring.”

“Uh, thanks guys, the rec room at Lance’s apartment building will do fine.”

“Sounds good to me,” Horacio said. “Hey We can ask Corby’s Dad if we can bring the mower”

“Or that old school project,” Corby said. “I still have it in a box somewhere.”

“You’re kidding?” Steve said.

“Yeah,” Corby said with a big grin. “But I’m glad I still have you guys!”

—end—

Posted in Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Friday Flash Fictions, LGBT, Short-Stories | Leave a comment

The Moon And Uluru. Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Results For March, 2025. Jeff Baker, March 10, 2025.

Posted on March 10, 2025 by jeffbaker307

Hi! I’m Mike, A.K.A. Jeff Baker.

The draws for the March 2025 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge were:

A Paranormal Story

Set in The Australian Outback

Involving a Set Of Stereo Speakers

E. H. Timms wrote: “Moonrise” https://thinkingthinking123.blogspot.com/2025/03/flash-fic-challenge-moonrise.html

And (as Jeff Baker) I wrote: “Here Comes the Sun” https://authorjeffbaker.com/2025/03/06/here-comes-the-sun-and-my-march-2025-flash-fiction-draw-challenge-story-jeff-baker-march-6th-2025/

Thanks for participating, and for reading and remember it’s never too late to write your own story, post it in the comments and I’ll link it here.

We’ll be back with another draw on April 7th, 2025.

Thanks again!

—–mike

Posted in E. H. Timms, Fiction, LGBT, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Short-Stories | Leave a comment

Listening to “The Scary Fairies” Podcast. Jeff Baker, March 10, 2025.

Posted on March 10, 2025 by jeffbaker307

by Jeff Baker

I’ve been listening to a new (and fun!) movie review podcast!

“The Scary Fairies” described as “a trio of long-lost fairy companions” who hold court in a hollow tree (the magic of radio or podcast!) and talk about a horror movie they’ve recently watched.

The trio (Matthew, Hannah and Evan) seem to be having a load of fun doing this, making the podcast enjoyable for the listener as well. (Word of caution, the Fairies’ commentary is sometimes rated PG.)

And yes, our trio are all LGBT.

I will have more on the show later on, in the meantime take a listen. New episodes are posted weekly on Apple Podcasts. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/scary-fairies/id1790379606

Posted in LGBT, Movies, podcasts | Leave a comment

Here Comes the Sun to Make A Rainbow. Rainbow Snippets from Jeff Baker; March 9th, 2025.

Posted on March 9, 2025 by jeffbaker307
Photo by Jonas Schallenberg on Pexels.com

Every week we post six lines from a work of ours, a work-in-progress or published or a recommendation of someone else’s work with at least one LGBT character. Posted at Rainbow Snippets here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/963484217054974

I don’t post as many snippets as I used to but these bits from my recent story “Here Comes the Sun” https://authorjeffbaker.com/2025/03/06/here-comes-the-sun-and-my-march-2025-flash-fiction-draw-challenge-story-jeff-baker-march-6th-2025/ fit the bill. Our snippets take my happily married Earthman Kenny and incognito extraterrestrial sorcerer Hank on a task to the Australian Outback,

Kenny Briscoe had been a few odd places since he’d fallen in love with an alien sorcerer. But the Australian Outback in the pre-dawn hours beat zipping to the convenience store at two A. M. for a sweet roll. He stared up at the brightening sky and the stars.

“Hey, look!” Kenny said. “I think that’s Alpha Centauri!”

“Been there, not impressed,” Hank said.

Okay, a bit more…

Hank Jones, Kenny’s husband was fiddling with a gadget that looked like a TV remote and pacing back and forth. And swearing in at least a couple of alien languages. The gadget would occasionally make a peeping noise and flash a light or two.

“C’mon! Deccha take you, you miserable…C’mon!” Hank muttered.

Kenny smiled. It reminded him for all the world of Dean Stockwell in a scene from the old “Quantum Leap” show. But his tanned, tall, slightly overweight husband looked a lot better to him than any actor.

Here’s a little bit more as Kenny asks Hank (who has been around for centuries) if he thinks we will get through the current troubles.

“If people sit around and do nothing, no. If they lose interest after a couple of weeks or get discouraged because of time or roadblocks in the way nothing will change. But one person can make a difference by speaking out or even posting online, writing a letter to the editor…one person’s effort could be seen by one other person who it changes. Then they go and affect someone else.” Hank looked over at Kenny.

“One person matters.” Hank said.

They kissed for a few moments standing there in the desert.

Sorry if I got a bit preachy, but my literary heroes Charles Dickens and Rod Serling used their work to explore society’s ills and current events so I must too.

Here’s a link to another of Kenny and Hank’s adventures. https://authorjeffbaker.com/2023/08/17/nothing-up-my-sleeve-a-coin-trick-for-friday-flash-fics-from-jeff-baker-august-17-2023/

See you later! —-jeff

Posted in Fantasy, Hank and Kenny, LGBT, Rainbow Snippets | 2 Comments

The Play’s Still the Thing, Newman University’s “Hamlet.” Review by Jeff Baker. (March 8, 2025)

Posted on March 8, 2025 by jeffbaker307

Hamlet (Corbin Molina, L) and Laertes (Austin Schwartz, R) are ready to duel as King Claudius (Daniel Graber, back L) and Queen Gertrude (Anna Corbett, back R) look on, in Newman University’s production of Shakespeare’s “Hamlet.”

Review by Jeff Baker

William Shakespeare’s ancient but still timely “Hamlet” was performed at Newman University on Friday March 7th, 2025 in a shorter version “designed to tour high schools so that current high school students can see the play come to life before their eyes.” (According to program notes by Director Mark Mannette.) The condensed version has lost none of its power to entertain and captivate the audience.

With painted castle backdrops, black curtains a raised platform and movable crates the production conveyed the play’s famous locations, including Elsinore Castle and a graveyard. Well done lighting and offstage sounds brought the audience to the Denmark of a bygone century. Doing it in modern dress worked in the play’s favor; the suits and ties worn by (among others) Polonius and King Claudius gave the royal family the feel of a family of mobsters. Hamlet wore leather vests, jackets and gloves which somehow accentuated his youth and the violent times in which he lived while Laertes upon returning from his travels was in a brown leather jacket and fedora that smacked of Indiana Jones but somehow seemed perfect!

In a cast full of standouts, many of them doubling (or tripling) up in roles, mention must be made of Daniel Cubias’ mobsterish Polonius and his scene stealing turn as the Grave Digger; Steven Brown’s fine and supportive turn as Hamlet’s best buddy Horatio. Anna Corbett as Queen Gertrude and Austin Schwartz as Laertes.

Abi Oberly’s Ophelia came off as tragically mad as she sang her lines while handing out rosemary for remembrance and Daniel Graber’s King Claudius had a nasty leer which seemed to say “Ha-Ha! They don’t know I poisoned my brother the King!”

Corbin Molina’s Hamlet bounded and stalked through the role as the now-obssessed young Prince who must come to grips not only with his father’s recent death and his uncle’s marrying his mother but with the charge by his father’s ghost to avenge his death at the hands of King Claudius. Molina conveyed the Prince’s inner agony and conflict without any hand wringing.

And in a very fitting touch, the ghost (Luke Jones) is made up with his beard to resemble Molina’s Hamlet.

Staging was not just actors standing around saying “To be or not to be,” there is a convincing near-brawl where Hamlet and Laertes must be physically restrained and the climactic swordfight, (very close to the audience!) which does not go well for any of the characters.

All in all, a marvelous evening of live theater from a Newman University Drama Department that is still thriving.

“Good night, Sweet Prince…”

Further productions of Hamlet at the Jabara Flexible Theater, Newman University, 3100 N. McCormick, Wichita will be March 8th at 7:30pm and April 3rd, 4th and 5th also at 7:30pm.

Program art by Luke Jones

Posted in Newman University, Reviews, William Shakespeare | Leave a comment

Ride the Hot Rod for Friday Flash Fics from Mike Mayak. (March 7, 2025)

Posted on March 7, 2025 by jeffbaker307

Hot Rod

by Mike Mayak

“Woah! Slow down!” Patrick said.

“It’s a hot rod,” Riley said. “Besides, we’re going the speed limit.”

“And we’re going round and round on this racetrack!” Patrick said.

“Yeah, isn’t it great?” Riley said. “Besides, we’re the only ones here. No traffic!”

There was no top on the yellow 1929 Roadster so they enjoyed the wind whipping through their hair and Patrick glanced up at the bright blue Kansas sky. He was from New Jersey.

Riley Abuthnot and Patrick Zither had been together for about six years, married officially for two when Riley inherited a share in the family business; a local racetrack just outside of Millington, Kansas. It had been closed for a couple of years but they had decided to re-open it along with Riley’s cousins who owned a share in it. The half mile dirt oval with a grandstand had been a fixture since about 1956 and shut down when Riley’s Great-Uncle died two years ago.

Riley took another lap around the track and slowed the car to a stop by the closed snack bar.

“You aren’t going to be racing are you?” Patrick asked.

“Hell no!” Riley laughed.

“Good! I’d divorce you if you did!”

The two men laughed. Then they sat in the car silently, enjoying the warmish Spring weather.

“You sure you want me to do this?” Riley asked. “Take this place over?”

“I’m sure.” Patrick said. He grinned broadly. “I’m very sure. Because it’s not just what you want, it’s what I want too.”

They kissed there in the car.

“It’s what we want,” Riley said. They kissed again, lingering this time.

“You know, I loved that internet headline: Local Gay Couple Re-Opens Local Speedway.” Patrick said.

“Yeah, except I’m Bi not Gay,” Riley said. “Don’t know how all the locals will take it. This isn’t Grove Street back in Jersey.”

“I know that,” Patrick said. They sat there another minute. “You know, we may make most of our money from customers at the snack bar. So we’d better hire somebody really good to run it.”

“Yeah,” Riley said.

“Hey, let’s drive around the track again,” Patrick said. “Maybe this time slower so I can get a good look at everything.”

“Okay,” Riley said, starting the engine again.

Their apartment in Millington had been home for about two years but the speedway was starting to feel like home to them too.

—end—

Posted in Fiction, Kansas, LGBT, Short-Stories | Leave a comment

“Here Comes The Sun.” And My March 2025 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Story! (Jeff Baker, March 6th, 2025.)

Posted on March 6, 2025 by jeffbaker307
Photo by Jonas Schallenberg on Pexels.com

Here Comes the Sun

by Jeff Baker

AUTHOR’S NOTE: The draws for the March 2025 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge were for a Paranormal Story, involving a set of Stereo Speakers set in the Australian Outback. This is what I came up with.

Kenny Briscoe had been a few odd places since he’d fallen in love with an alien sorcerer. But the Australian Outback in the pre-dawn hours beat zipping to the convenience store at two A. M. for a sweet roll. He stared up at the brightening sky and the stars.

“Hey, look!” Kenny said. “I think that’s Alpha Centauri!”

“Been there, not impressed,” Hank said.

Hank Jones, Kenny’s husband was fiddling with a gadget that looked like a TV remote and pacing back and forth. And swearing in at least a couple of alien languages. The gadget would occasionally make a peeping noise and flash a light or two.

“C’mon! Deccha take you, you miserable…C’mon!” Hank muttered.

Kenny smiled. It reminded him for all the world of Dean Stockwell in a scene from the old “Quantum Leap” show. But his tanned, tall, slightly overweight husband looked a lot better to him than any actor.

Hank had explained it again to Kenny as they had flown around the world from Wichita in a conjured “sphere of transport.” (“Invisible to just about everything, including radar!” Hank had said.)

It sounded simple to hear Hank say it as they had soared through the sky:

“You know how there’s the North Pole, the True North Pole that points at Polaris? And then there’s the Magnetic North Pole, where the Magnetic Field of Earth is centered? Well, there’s a mystical pole too, and this is it. The Uluru Rock has been sacred to the native people in the Outback and they have no idea why. It centers a bunch of ambient mystical energy that swirls around Earth. And it has to be checked and maybe calibrated every now and then.” Hank said.

“Every couple of hundred years or so?” Kenny said, casually dropping the fact that Hank was at least three-hundred-and-something years old.

“About every eight months,” Hank said, “basically whenever the rotation of the Earth aligns with…well, I have a gadget to check it with.” Hank looked at Kenny with a broad grin. “Remind me to tell you about our class field trip to Polaris sometime!”

They had soared invisibly over the night side of the Earth with daylight behind them and the ocean below. Kenny thought he could pick out a few lights in the darkness.

“And if we’re lucky that’ll be all I need to do.” Hank said.

“And if we’re not lucky?” Kenny had asked.

“Then a bunch of us will have to come out here and work a calibration field ritual and that would be…”

“Ah! Got it!” Hank said, snapping Kenny’s attention back to the present.

“Got it? All done?” Kenny asked.

“No, but I just had to set this for the right frequency. Give me a few minutes and we’ll be all done.”

“Hey, can’t you handle all that with a spell or two?” Kenny asked.

“Would take too long and there are too many tourists,” Hank said. “Besides, this jury rigged revulator is a lot more efficient and it has a little display screen. Okay. Here we go.”

Hank held the device at arm’s length and walked along the stone side of Uluru which was imposing even in the deep shadows of night.

“Uh, you don’t have to walk around that all the way do you?” Kenny said, wondering if he should say anything aloud.

“Nope,” Hank said, looking at the little screen as he walked. “Y’know, tourists are always mailing little chunks of Uluru they pick up back here saying it brings them bad luck. They have no idea it’s all the focalized mystical energy that they’ve…aha! Okay, bring that thing over here.”

Kenny picked up the big cloth shopping bag with the MP3 player and large speakers.

“Push the speakers right up against the rock. I need to measure a sonic vibration and then we’re done.”

“What sound do you need?” Kenny said, pushing the speakers up to Uluru.

Hank looked up, the sky was getting lighter. He grinned. “How about ‘Here Comes the Sun?’”

Kenny nodded and keyed it up from his playlist. In a moment, the muffled strains of the Fab Four were heard over that small section of desert.

“Annnnnd…yessss! Perfect!” Hank said looking up from the screen. “Good for another few months.”

“Want me to turn this off?” Kenny asked, pointing at the speakers.

“Naaa. Let it play out. Let’s just stand here and watch the dawn on Uluru.” Hank said, stuffing the gadget in his back pocket.

The two men stood arm in arm as the massive rock was tinted with the light of the sunrise.

“Hey,” Kenny said. “You’ve been around on Earth a few years, right?”

“A few hundred, yeah.” Hank said.

“The stuff that’s going on right now. Back home, I mean.” Kenny said. “You think we…the country will make it through it okay?”

“Depends,” Hank said, staring at the rock. “If people sit around and do nothing, no. If they lose interest after a couple of weeks or get discouraged because of time or roadblocks in the way nothing will change. But one person can make a difference by speaking out or even posting online, writing a letter to the editor…One person’s effort could be seen by one other person who it changes. Then they go and affect someone else.” Hank looked over at Kenny.

“One person matters.” Hank said.

They kissed for a few moments standing there in the desert.

—end—

NOTE: The photo is of Uluru. Another of Hank and Kenny’s adventures appeared here: https://rommanticreads.wordpress.com/2023/06/17/jeff-baker-make-me-immortal-with-a-kiss/

Posted in Fantasy, Fiction, Hank and Kenny, LGBT, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, Paranormal, Science Fiction, Short-Stories | Leave a comment

A Paranormal Story In Stereo! (And then we can go to Outback!) Flash Fiction Draw Challenge Draws For March, 2025. (Mike Mayak, March 3, 2025)

Posted on March 3, 2025 by jeffbaker307

Photo By Amy Tharp

Here’s the draws for the March 2025 Flash Fiction Draw Challenge. Followed by my usual long-winded explanation:

A Paranormal Story

Involving A Set Of Stereo Speakers

Set in The Australian Outback

Now, on to the details.

Hi! I’m Mike Mayak, I also write as Jeff Baker and I’m the current moderator for the monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge, which was started by ‘Nathan Burgoine a few years ago and carried on by Cait Gordon and Jeffrey Ricker. It’s a monthly writing challenge mainly for stress-free fun that anyone can play.

Here’s how it works: the first Monday of every month I draw three cards; a heart, a diamond and a club. These correspond to a list naming a genre, a setting and an object that must appear in the story. Participants write up a flash fiction story, 1,000 words or less, post it to their website and link it here in the comments. I’ll post the results (including, hopefully, one of my own!) on the blog.

As I’m no good making videos I did the drawing offstage. So, the results were the Eight of Hearts (a Paranormal Story), the King of Diamonds (The Australian Outback) and the Jack of Clubs (A Set Of Stereo Speakers.)

So we will write Paranormal fiction, set in the Australian Outback involving a Set of Stereo Speakers.

We’ll have the results here in this same space around Monday March 10th, 2025.

So, get to writing and I’ll post the results next week! And I’m putting the 2025 Flash Draw sheet at the end of this message, again! (* indicates those have been used.)

Thanks for playing, and I’ll see you in about week!

And have fun!

——mike

Here’s the list:

Flash Draw Sheet for 2025 (“*” indicates prompt has been used.)

Clubs

A A Rusted Knife

*2 A Set of Stereo Speakers

3 A Spare Tire

4 A Moldy Wig

5 A Clown Costume

6 A Bowl Full Of Jelly

7. A Circus Poster

*8 A Bottle Of Poison

9 A Director’s Chair

10 A Bicycle

*J A Hair Sofa

Q A Crystal Ball

K A Set of Leg Irons

Hearts

A A Mystery

2 A Fairy Tale

3 A Caper Story

4 A Horror Story

5 A Fantasy

6 Science Fiction

7. A Comedy

*8 A Paranormal Story

*9 A Shaggy Dog Story

10 A Western

J A Romance

Q A Cyberpunk Story

*K Historical Fiction

Diamonds

A A Swimming Pool

2 A Pool Hall

3 A Space Station

4 An Olympic Stadium

5 A Palace

6 A Trolley

*7 A Synagogue

8 A Library

9 A Race Track

* 10 A Line Outside a Theater

J The Empire State Building

Q A Convenience Store

*K The Australian Outback.

Posted in 'Nathan Burgoine, Cait Gordon, Jeffrey Ricker, Monthly Flash Fiction Draw Challenge | 2 Comments

The Great Auk Squawks! Friday Flash Fics With Captain Ecology And Compost Boy, from Jeff Baker. February 28th, 2025.

Posted on February 28, 2025 by jeffbaker307

The Great Auk Squawks/Rock Chalk Great Auk

by Jeff Baker

Afternoon in Goat’s Town and those dauntless costumed crusaders against crime Captain Ecology and Compost Boy are cruising the snowy streets in the Ecolo-Car.

(Not that kind of cruising.)

What makes this Wintry scene unusual is that it’s the middle of July!

“Icy streets in mid-July,” Compost Boy said over-enthusiastically. “Golly, Captain Ecology, this is way off-base.”

“Not in the Antipodean countries where they get Winter while we’re having summer but you’re right. This is unusual.” Captain Ecology said.

“It must be some dastardly super-villain responsible for this, maybe Doctor Icicle!” Compost Boy said.

“You could be right,” Captain Ecology said. “But I’m not sure that…”

His comment was interrupted by a beeping from the dashboard.

“I got it,” Compost Boy said as he flipped the switch. A familiar evil laugh filled the car.

“Auk! Auk! Auk! Attention, you ecologically sound do-gooders! I’m messing with your precious environment!”

“The Great Auk!” Captain Ecology said, his eyes narrowing.

“Yes,” the voice from the speaker sneered. “And I’m using my electro-environment destabilizer to change the climate! Auk! Auk! Auk! Goat’s Town will be a solid block of ice unless the city pays me One-Milli…I mean, an unspecified sum!”

“You fiend!” Captain Ecology said gripping the steering wheel.

“And if you try to stop me, you’ll become environmentally friendly popsicles! Auk! Auk! Auk!”

There was a beep as the Great Auk hung up.

“Golly, Captain Ecology, how are we going to stop him?” Compost Boy said. “And why did I ever pick a costume where I’m in short pants all the time?”

“I’m sure President Carter would be fine with you turning up the heat in the Ecolo-Car this one time,” Captain Ecology said. “And while you’re at it, turn on the Ecco-Excess-Energy Tracker.”

“Which he installed instead of a tape deck,” Compost Boy muttered to himself. “Oh well, at least I get girls and guys checking me out in these shorts.”

(Okay, maybe one of them is cruising.)

About fifteen minutes later the Ecolo-Car pulled into the parking lot of a gas station with signs advertising snacks and cold drinks and small round tables covered with metal beach umbrellas outside. The umbrellas were covered with snow.

“Those metal umbrellas are clearly the Great Auk’s disguised transmitters,” Captain Ecology sad.

“Once we put him out of commission we can put these out of commission!” Compost Boy said, punching his fist into his other hand.

“Or just make Auk show us the off switch,” Captain Ecology said.

Captain Ecology and Compost Boy walked into the snack area filled with shelves of chips and candy. They spotted a bearded figure in a company uniform behind a checkout counter.

“Hold it right there, Great Auk!” Captain Ecology shouted. “We see right through your disguise!”

“We’re gonna make you extinct!” Compost Boy yelled triumphantly.

“Nevermind,” the Great Auk said pulling off the fake nose and beard. “We’re all in trouble now. I was just handed these.”

The Great Auk tossed them pieces of paper. Captain Ecology quickly read through it.

“A copyright notice,” he sighed.

“I bet it was that prefacing everything with Ecolo that did it,” Compost Boy said.

“Auk! Auk! Auk!” The Great Auk squawked.

—end—

Posted in Captain Ecology and Compost Boy, crime, Fantasy, Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Friday Flash Fictions, LGBT, Science Fiction, Short-Stories, snow | Leave a comment

Mr. Fix, the River Styx and Friday Flash Fics. By Jeff Baker, February 21, 2025

Posted on February 21, 2025 by jeffbaker307

Mister Fix And the River Styx

by Jeff Baker

“Two-Hundred pounds!” the Bank Manager said to Detective Fix. “We will be ruined.”

“Two-Hundred pounds is not much in the grand scheme of things,” Inspector Fix said.

“You don’t understand,” the manager said. “Our reputation is one for security and safety. If word of this gets out…”

“I understand,” Fix said, concealing that he was losing some of his patience. “Tell me again what happened.”

“There is nothing to tell,” the manager said. “It was the end of the day. We were counting the money. We keep a very careful accounting of every shilling. But to-night we were short. By two-hundred pounds! Oh, Lord! What am I going to do?”

Fix was about to say something when an officer burst into the room.

“We caught him,” he said breathless. “He ran and we shot him. You’d better come quickly.”

As the three of them rushed outside from the bank offices the officer told his story.

“Me and Ruddy were doing our patrol, right? And we seen this shifty-looking character drop out of a tree down the way, holding a bag. It’s dark enough he didn’t think anybody would notice. But we noticed. We gave chase. And that’s when he fired.”

“Fired?” Fix asked. “Armed?”

“Criminals usually are,” the officer said. “But he stumbled and fell and the gun went off again. Into him. Here we are, Sir.” They could hear the bank manager panting behind them.

A younger officer was kneeling beside a prone figure in dark clothing lying in the street. Fix quickly noticed a gun and a cloth bag, smaller than a carpet bag which the officer had set behind himself.

“What’s the situation?” Fix asked.

“Better ask yourself, Sir,” Ruddy, the young officer said. “He doesn’t have much time, I’ll wager.”

Fix bent down to see the man who was breathing hard and bleeding profusely. “Fetch a doctor,” he said. The officer who had fetched them ran off towards Baker Street.

Always aware of his surroundings, Fix noticed the bank manager standing there, staring at the man.

“It’s Alfred…Sleazy Alfred they call him.”

“Yes,” Fix said. He knew him by reputation.

The bank manager rummaged through the bag. “This isn’t even half of the money,” he said.

Fix glared at Sleazy Alfred. “Where’s the rest of it?”

Alfred coughed and managed to say. “He has it…handed it to me out the window. I climb trees like a monkey I do. Hopped from one to the other and hid.”

Fix glanced around. The area was planted with trees like an urban forest.

“We split the money…” Alfred continued.

“He took the lion’s share,” Fix said.

“We did it quick after they left the bank…I hid again, he kept his bag under his coat.”

“I searched the three employees, Scott, Wilson and Dougal. Found nothing,” the bank manager said. “And we looked all over the bank. Nothing.”

“Of course,” Fix said. “He slipped it to a confederate outside. Alfred. Now, who is he?”

Alfred coughed. “I don’t know the name,” he said. “Said it was better that way…an’ he said he’d be across the river Styx before they found out…”

Fix glared down at Alfred. “What did he mean by that?”

Alfred gave a gurgle and Fix realized he wouldn’t be giving him any answers.

Fix stood up. The bank manager looked like he was going to faint.

“I’ve never seen…never seen anybody…I mean after being shot…” the manager said.

“Yes,” Fix said. “When the doctor arrives let me back in your office. I want to check the files on the three employees who were there.”

In the office, the lamplight flickering on the wall calendar with the date 1873 as Fix looked over the personnel records and the bank manager rambled on.

“They’ve been with the bank for years…” he said, and for the seemingly hundredth time he listed the suspect employees. “Wilson Dougal, we call him Willie. Steadfast Daniel Miller, we call him that because, well everybody does. And James Scott…I can’t believe that any of them would…”

“I can,” Fix said looking up from the papers. “I’m sending some officers over to arrest our man.”

Back at police headquarters Fix was enjoying a smoke with some of the officers.

“But Inspector,” one of them said. “How could you be certain…”

Fix smiled. “I wasn’t totally certain, but I had a hunch. The culprit had referred to the River Styx. And that tied in my memory with something I’d heard once; Durante or Dante is a word meaning steadfast. And Daniel is a nickname for Durante. He has an obsession with the classics. His personnel file lists him as living in a house called The Elysian Fields.” Fix took a long puff of his pipe. “Just over the River Styx.”

—end—

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Yes, this is the detective from Jules Verne’s “Around the World In Eighty Days.” I’d wanted to do a story about him and the prompt picture provided the impetus and the title. Although the story doesn’t have a lot to do with a river! ——-jsb 2/21/25

Posted in crime, Detective Fix, Fiction, Friday Flash Fics, Friday Flash Fictions, Mystery, Short-Stories | 2 Comments